Why saying NO is important

For most people saying NO does not come easily. Often this is because we worry about offending or upsetting others. We may also fear damaging relationships or disappointing people. In addition, we may feel that people will judge us, which might have a negative impact on our reputations.

More important, still, is what we believe saying NO is saying about us. We may feel like a failure, that we are admitting weakness, that we are not willing to help or we may believe that we won’t be liked by others if we dare say NO.

However, when we say YES while we actually mean NO, we can end up feeling resentful, exploited, taken for granted or even abused. [Ironically, we lose sight of the fact that we were the ones who initially said yes.] Ultimately, it can have devastating effects on our relationships, our physical and mental health, our personal and professional performance, as well as our experience of living a meaningful and fulfilling life.

Some of the benefits of saying NO are:

- It allows us to focus on what is important to us and to make decisions that align with our goals and values. It therefore helps with personal and professional growth.

- It can help us to avoid commitments and situations that are not beneficial to us.

- When we say YES when we mean yes and NO when we mean no, it shows people that our intentions are genuine and our word can be trusted.

- It can reduce stress and prevent burnout.

- It can be an empowering experience as we will feel more in control of our time and energy.

- It indicates that we accept personal responsibility for living a life congruent with our beliefs, values, priorities and purpose.

In closing, remember the following:

“No is a complete sentence. It does not require an explanation to follow. You can truly answer someone’s request with a simple no.” Sharon E. Rainey

Download the Helpful tips and techniques for saying NO from the Tools section.